im sales engineer... so what?!

Passed all subjects, not officially graduated yet, but officially an engineer. i feel proud to myself, thanks to my family and friends, their support, their advice and also the craziness. 5 years of the college life officially end. From now, I never think that i will be back to the college life, part time maybe, full time? i dun think so.

i was happy when the first day i went to my office. everyone's face hanging with a big smile and welcome to join their team. feel super warm. one by one shake hand, greet and joke around. i tell myself that this is a very good start! i found what i want, i mean the job and it seems like very challenging.

Training provided and started to picking up the products detail. at the moments, i can feel that what everyone is talking about, "working and studying are totally different". what we had learn in school are standard or some people said that was naive. when come to the real world, those are reality. there are so many different products, very confusing, it's complicated. Senior will expect you know everything. YEA, What i know is only "i dun know anything"! what to do?!

The days getting hard and harder. firstly ofcourse im the one who can't really pick up what they has taught me, is tough. secondly, senior expect you're clever. he would simply tell you a solution, that the solution can be worked but can't be accepted. the felling was like "what the... " . cool?? i believe if i can handle all those things, surely i will be stronger.

yup, this is what i want and planed previously. enter the sales line after graduated, be a project people, don't stay in a factory, dealing with peoples... i get what i planed, but im still thinking is this what i really need. i mean is it the right path way to the "success" that i defined.

any comments?

counting down to exam day... 2 more days... scheduled a own time table to find the best time to concentrate and study hard. the time is like totally different with a normal people, its like wake up when ppl sleep, go to bed when ppl awake... probably lost contact with some friends... the moment working hard and some friends' going to have fun, it's kinda upset that myself coulnt join. it makes me even more cannot concentrate. hmmm.... why dun wait for me? sigh, she not even asked me whether joining or not... jst few more dayssss.... plzzz... i wanted to go, but i cant, not i dun want, i really cannot make it..... sigh....

stress.......... yea, i admit that im kinda emotional people, but at least forgive me that i being emotional when im in stressful exam period.... hmmm... i did it to you also rite? that situation even worst...

Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus, Focus,

fuck us..... sigh!!!

Released!

its study week.. must fight until die to pass the last two subject... at the same time i applied for jobs, arranged some interviews, and previously was busy about class gathering, quite busy plus a lil stressful. im not complaining that im stressful, i jst share with you all. i enjoy being lonely and also the moment talk to the wall. dunnoe why, bad things always come at the stressful moment.

sigh... sometime i jst need someone to be here, and here is always me alone in the nite. Most of the friends started their working life, everyone is busy and not like last time, can hang until midnite just to chit chat.

hmmm.. the class gathering was well organized and everything just great. everyone worked according to the plan, bring and bought the food they had promised. it was so great. but unexpected some of the food too much. being an organizer, chairman, treasurer, planner, secretary, dj, i feel that it is sucesful coz the gathering achieved all the objective like most of our course-mate attended the gathering, majority bring some foods, 1st time ever we all dinner together, we played together, we celebrate birthday, we seat down and talk, all is 1st time ever. although its sucesful but i still dun feel satisfaction, maybe that is not good enough for me. or maybe wasted too much foods. next time i can do it better i think. thanks to myself that organised a gathering to everyone.

#i cant stand to fly, im not that naive, im just out to find, the better part of me.... wish that i could cry, fall upon my knee, find a way to lie, about a home i'll never see... i may be disturb but wont you concede, even heroes have the right to dream it's not easy... im only a man with the silly red sheet, only a man looking for her dream. its not easy to be me#

im listening to "superman" by five for fighting. this is a nice song. it tells superman's thoughts. everyone thought that he is strong, but the truth is ppl dun see him when he is weak. actualy this song is not only describing superman's feeling, it's about the other side of one thing that we never see. we stand on our side to think and never consider other's ppl's feeling. in the song superman is the best example.

sigh.. facing the wall, make me feel lonely... actualy i quite enjoy silence but sumtime the feeling of missing sumone turns the night to become lonely nite. in the quiet nite, if you sudenly remembered the word that hurt you by someone then the night is lonely + sad. what to do? SLEEEEP!!! finish complaining... ciao!

plz translate for me

Ang Ang bo hai lang

Just bought a dark red chuck taylor slim!!! I love converse!!

gonna wear it on my birthday!!!

=D

This month is my "pms" month. average mood is super low, of course i did enjoy the early birthday celebration day, tats a good present. march is a stuff month for me. a lot of thing still left undone; and im still here typing and fb ing, i feel so unmotivated.

what's in my head?

it's blank... it don't suppose to be blank...

what i need now?

a boxing sandbag! i need a good listener! a silence place!!!

sigh... days with no transport and relying on ppl is super not convenient... and the feeling of asking help often is not good...

do you think LDR is good?

i dun think so. coz i always assume that my another half is my listener. i wish she is the best listener. i would like to talk everything with her when i've something to tell; and i dun like to talk everything in a choosen time period. and i still prefer to talk face to face, see each other espression rather than cook ear by using the phone. but i understand this is not we want. and its temporally... temporally, rite?? im not sure...

sometime it's not easy to find someone to talk to. i like to on fb recently. coz there is so much frens stay online. simply choose a stranger to talk. i can talk whatever and the stranger wont tell anyone coz we dunnoe each other, the stranger has no people to share. recently i'm still finding the best stranger in fb... haha...

Sien la....